The Road Now

You sit in sadness

Your pain so great you do not feel me

You do not hear me

You see my death and cry out why

I can not tell you why

Why may never be known to you

I have left this earth but rest in your heart

I knock at your door

Forgive and heal

Forgive me and forgive yourself

Fault is not yours

Heal by knowing I am with you

I am in all that you do

I am home if you grow

Grow and I am at peace

Love me and understand

You will hear my knock upon the door

Open the door and see

I really never left you

For You are me

I am you

The Road Now

The Road Now

When my grandfather died I had nobody to turn to.

 I did not cry, I was not sad and those around me called me names

I did not know what I was, I did not know what I felt.

Life later defined this day as lost, angry and confused

One week earlier I sat with the old man and listened as he spoke not the usual riddle.

He told me he was leaving this earth and I would no longer see him.

He shared two words with me, sacred words they turned out to be.

For many years these words would bring me light and guide me through the darkness.

My darkness being me, running, him leading as my wounds.

My loss was great, evidenced by the dent in my soul

Peace, Love, and Understanding I would not  find until my own son and I traveled

Into a land unknown by me since I was a young boy, together we  journeyed

The land was unkept and littered with weeds and a fading light of a marker hoping to be noticed.

There I saw his name and cleared the land as my young son watched

Anger, hurt, and disappointment ascended from the soil into the heavens

I began to understand and it was clear to me

Leaving was not something he could have controled

Yan Yak my friend in your time of grief, and forever as you walk forward

In the abundant light that you so freely share

May you find Peace, Love and Understanding

The Road Now

The Road Now

Young boy I sit here an old man.

With you I roll down the highway toward the end on my life.

The end of my life will weigh heavy upon you as you travel in search of the light.

You will meet many who shine and you will believe they are the ones I speak about.

Be careful not to indulge too heavily in that which will cause separation of soul from self.

Years will pass and tears will fall because the road I traveled weeps for you.

Pay attention to your heart and remember that soul and self will correct each other.

 Warmth and understanding will enter from the distance and light you will see.

Subtle when you sleep in happines and bright when your life is lost in the sadness and disappointment.

Young boy you are growing old and the road you have traveled weeps……………………….

I have no answer

I know not how to explain

That which guides me

I know not why

The light from the east

Shines so bright within my soul

Epaminon why did you leave me so soon

The Road Now

The Road Now

She Stood In Front Of You And Cried For Help

Together We Looked Out The Window

You Saw Guilt I Saw Grief

You Stood In Front Of Me Sending Words

About The Doors In Life You’d Heard About

One Closes And A Window Opens

I Stand Before You And Send Words 

About The Doors In Life I Have Talked About

The Doors That Lead To A Corrected Soul

The Doors That Lead Toward The Light Of Understanding

The Doors That Lead To The Voice That Speaks Softly Within

The Doors That Gently Teach One How To Live

Quickly Closing The Windows And Keeping

Those That Supposedly Love You

From Stealing Your God Given Identity

The Road Now

The Road Now

Be honest as you speak

Reveal what you think you see

You might find A friend

The Road Now

The separation between reality and fiction is non existent

Anxiety and peace sit as if  holding hands

In a dark room the sounds of  a life once lived

Echo and force ones exit into

Sunny days that are confused with

Cold rain dripping upon a broken face

Smiles reveal the anger buried beneath the eyes

That look up  from the ground below at

The feet which wear the shoes that don’t always fit

The Road Now

The Road Now

Years of looking for that which was supposed to be a given.

Looking for guidance and direction I found my comfort

In Liquid that went down as hard as your Temper

But soon felt as good as what I thought I sought

The Clouds that filled my lungs were like the love I had heard about

Needles of hope altered my blood but not my DNA

Because of your absence I grew into nothing to mimic.

Leaving became a daily death that would soon be buried deep beneath the sadness nobody will see.

The possibility of your return being non-existent

Leaves me within the walls

Littered with graffiti of you

Dad why did you let your son go astray?

The Road Now

Your sickness is not my sickness

 Therefore I pray for peace, love, and understanding

In all that I do and those you come in contact with

My sickness is not yours

Therefore I pray for peace, love, and understanding

In all that you do and those that I come in contact with

Peace for the struggles with our sickness

Love for the ability to one day talk with each other about our sickness

Understanding for why we can not yet do so

The Road Now

She has been around the block a few times

She was with me before she was with you

She was with you before she was with me

She was here after you left

She will be there when I leave

She is a bottle of wine

She is a good cigar

She is a bottle of Jack

She is my crack

The Road Now